Friday, May 16, 2014

Oh Holy Nighty? --- SAY WHAT?

Church Projection Screen Gaffs...
This is gonna be fun!

The other day at church I saw the projector spilling words upon the screen so we, the parishioners, could "follow the bouncing ball", so to speak. The song they chose was a beloved hymn from centuries back, Amazing Grace.  But the screen said, "Amazing Grapes."

Perhaps it was a song about the men Joshua sent to spy out the land? No, it was a gaff. And a funny one at that. I stopped singing and then endured the frowns from those surrounding me as I attempted to hold in my laughter. I guess they were either more spiritual than me, or they failed to catch the typo. So, if this has happened in my church, where else has it happened? I did a quick google search and found some funny gaffs that I thought you'd enjoy as well...

1. “Lord, You are more precious than silver… Lord, You are more costly than golf.”

2. It was Easter. The line was supposed to read “We were naked and poor” but instead it read “We were naked and poop.” I could not stop laughing for the rest of the song.

3. When we lived in Latin America: the line in the song was supposed to be “levantando manos santas” (lifting holy hands) but they wrote “monos” (monkeys) instead of “manos” and put that on the screen. Lifting holy monkeys. Um hmm.

4. “Our God is greeter, our God is stronger.” I like that image. God greeting us as we walk into church. He’s like the little old lady who shakes our hands, only … He is God and God gives high fives!

5. Lion of God turned into “Loin of God.” My bad.

6. I create the lyric sheets for our small fellowship, and one Sunday the “strumpets” were calling during Days of Elijah. Oops.

7. The slide said “four our sins He died.” Someone behind me asked if we’re on our own for the fifth sin.

8. The best one I have seen was: “Amazon love, how can it be?”

9. I’m personally a fan of “Angles We Have Heard on High” at Christmastime. I always assume they are right angles.

10. I once attended a performance of Handel’s “Messiah” where the phrase “surely He has borne our griefs” was printed as “surely He has borne our briefs” in the programs given to the audience. I laughed for a while.

11. “I once was blond, but now I see” during “Amazing Grace.”

12. Once saw "O that with yonder sacred THONG." Worship leader never lived that one down.

13. “Silent Night,” forgot to change the slide, happened two years straight, lights down, holding candles: "Radiant beans from Thy holy face."

14. “How deep the Farters love for us” . . . nope, not making this up!

15. The one that comes to mind was the misspelling in "Joy to the World" a few years ago at one of our Christmas services. It was supposed to be "rocks, hills and plains" but ended up as "rocks, hells and plains."

16. I failed to run a check over the PowerPoint once. We were singing "Holy is the Lord" and during the pre-chorus the screen read "Together we sing, Everyone sin." That's a little different than "Everyone sing"…

17. “Savior, He can move the mountains, my God is mighty to shave, He is mighty to shave....”

18. In a final proof of a Christmastime bulletin before printing, I saw that I had inadvertently typed "O Holy Nighty."

19. At Christmas one year, our youth intern misspelled things, so we sang about, "Marty, the mother of Jesus." Good times.

20. I was producing video at a traditional hymn service and in a rush my operator typed the words "God gives us the gift of immoral gladness." He thought he got away with only the team knowing but overheard two dear old ladies say to each other "it shows the importance of just one letter 't'."

Originally shared on the website of author Jon Acuff.

Feel free to click the "share" buttons and spread the joy amongst your friends.

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